Sam-K.net

First, Bill Gates claimed that the iPod was on its way out. Now Microsoft’s CEO Steve Ballmer is declaring that Google’s reign will also be shortlived.

Gates & Ballmer (kinda sounds like either a skin care product line, or a 70′s police drama; “Gates & Ballmer: they’re cops. Sunday nights on ABC”) are either making this stuff up thinking that their words alone can crush Google & the iPod (“a wacky new cartoon show airing Saturday mornings on ABC!”), or they’re off their respective nuts.

Google and the iPod have transcended their own original purposes, also becoming pop culture icons. Google is now a verb for searching for information on the web (“I Googled your name yesterday; I didn’t know you founded the Paperclip Appreciation Society.”), and the developers have expanded Google’s role into e-mail, and information storage as well as retrieval. The iPod has made cameos appearances in movies (Blade Trinity), TV shows (The Simpsons) and comics.

The one difference between Google and the iPod is that Google, arguably, is the best in its class, while the iPod, arguably, isn’t. But while there are music players out there that have more features, more storage space and are cheaper than comparable iPods, the fact that the iPod carries with it Apple’s carefully created “think different” image ensures–for now–its position at the top of the digital music player heap.

Ballmer and Gates are definitely smoking something.

At least, that’s what this image, digitally constructed from CT scans of the famous mummy, seems to suggest. I guess lineage wins out over a weak chin. I blame the French artists who created the image for the eyeliner. I have to wonder how accurate this image actually is considering that the scientists were taking CT scans of a long (LONG, LONG, LONG, etc.) dead person. You’d think even mummification couldn’t completely halt the disfiguring hands of death. Still, I guess it’s safe to assume any such facial deformation from the process was probably taken into account. But boy, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a chin that weak.

This Louis Vuitton mouse can be yours for a paltry $300 US. And what, you may ask, do you get for your three Bennies? Not much, aside from the disbelieving stares of your more reasonable friends. In true Louis Vuitton fashion — where form usurps function rather than follows it — this is nothing more than a $5 mouse with the Louis Vuitton name. It has no scroll wheel, a boring design and a frosted plastic body that looks about as robust as a tissue paper anvil. Oh, and it’s not even USB — that’s right — it’s a PS/2 ball mouse.

I was in a Louis Vuitton store in Manhattan a few years ago, and I saw a $15,000 steamer trunk for sale. Despite what the price suggests, it was not encrusted with diamonds or filled with gold dubloons. The only thing it was encrusted with was the god-awful green and gold LV logo. I’ve noticed that use of the word “encrusted” is limited to two categories: things covered in precious jewels and things covered in barnacles. I think that it also works well with the LV logo, but its connotation varies depending on whether you’re a LV customer or a sane person.

In December of 1999, NASA’s Mars Polar Lander landed Mars the hard way. According to the theory proposed by NASA’s review board, the lander was lost only meters above the surface of the red planet. During the final minutes of decent, the MPL’s landing legs deployed; the jolt caused by the legs as they locked into place was misinterpreted by the computer as a touchdown signal. The MPL thought it had landed, and the computer’s mistake was a multi-million dollar one. Thinking it had touched down, the computer shut off the lander’s engines too early, causing the MPL to crash into the Martian soil from a height of 130 feet. Until recently, no one knew exactly what became of the lander.

According to an article in Sky & Telescope Magazine, the fate of the poor little guy may now be known.

Yesterday, Joss Whedon’s Serenity was screened in 10 cities across the country, and reviews are just starting to pour in. When people review early test screenings of films, just about every review contains mild or major plot spoilers. I’ve seen only ONE review of Serenity — out of about 10 — that contains any spoilers at all, and they were clearly marked as such (lucky for me).

There hasn’t been a single negative review of the film yet (one review was mixed, but the only negative part of it was the reviewer’s speculation that the film would be a “hard sell” to the general public). Even the people who weren’t very familiar with Firefly, the shortlived series on which the film is based, are saying that the film is excellent. Most of the reviewers mention that the film was — to use a cliché — a labor of love, and it shows onscreen.

Joss Whedon created Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel and, like it or not, Alien Resurrection. When Buffy was cancelled, there wasn’t much argument or protest, even from Joss. But it was clear that the cancellation of Firefly was not something Joss wanted to accept, and neither did the rabid fans of the show. Joss has stated that the Firefly/Serenity story was one that he HAD to tell. He had been working on it for a long time; it wasn’t just another project for him.

Fox cancelled Firefly after only 15 episodes were shot (and only 12 of those were aired), but the fan response, along with the efforts of Joss and the cast of the show, got the attention of Universal. Universal purchased the film rights from Fox, but the contract between them stipulates that the show cannot return to series format for 10 years. Whether those terms were negotiated by Universal to prevent a series from affecting film revenues, or by Fox to prevent them from looking like fools for cancelling a potentially successful series, who’s to say? The plan is that if Serenity fares well at the box office, there will be more films. Judging by the screening reviews, that seems like a good possibility.

It’s just as disappointing to see a person’s vision stifled as it is pleasant to see it brought to fruition. Firefly is one of my favorite TV series, and I’m glad that the story will continue.